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When you hate your child’s bully

When you hate your child's bully

When you find out that your child’s being bullied, it’s normal to feel extreme anger. You may even feel hatred towards your child’s bully.

In fact, you’ve probably never been so angry in your life as finding out that your child has been targeted and picked on. It’s like being sucker-punched, it is devastating.

 And it’s normal to have those feelings of anger.

Because as parents, when we find out our kids are being bullied, the mama, bear claws come out. And you just can’t believe somebody is treating your child in such an unkind way.

And it is even more painful if your child is being picked on by kids that you’ve both probably  known since they were in kindergarten.

Talk to a counsellor or a close friend to help process your feelings about the bullying

Obviously, you’re going to tell a few close friends about it. But for now, I wouldn’t go telling the whole school. If you can, talk to a therapist about it. 

I would recommend talking to Better Health, they have some great counselors.  Speaking to a counselor helps process what you’re feeling and make sense of it all. The bullying is a huge emotional shock that nothing can prepare you for.

It’s not something that you’re expecting and it is devastating as a parent as you try to take stock of the situation. 

As a parent, you can feel despair and powerlessness when your child is being picked on and you can’t be there to protect your child every  moment of the day. You may feel helpless but there are many things you can do to help empower your child. Watch our free training on how to bully proof your child.

Don’t talk to the kids who are bullying your child on the school property

What I do suggest is that you don’t say anything to the kids at school. There have been several situations where a mom went up and talked to her child bully, and then the mom was banned from coming on the school grounds. 

Which meant her child who needed her support wasn’t able to provide that kind of support to her own child while the bully got off scot free. 

But the mum couldn’t go on field trips, she couldn’t stand on the playground, she had to stand off school property. 

Make sure you have nothing physically to do with your child’s bully. 

  • Don’t point at at the bully on school grounds
  • Don’t talk to them
  • Don’t yell at the bully

Your child needs you to be able to go on the school grounds

When  you are sorting out a bullying situation you need to  attend meetings at the school and present yourself in the most professional way possible. 

You may feel like some of these kids are monsters. You won’t be the first person to feel that way.

Anything you have to say, say it directly to the school and I know that in moments it may feel hard to control those emotions, but just remember to keep it in check for the benefit of your own child.

Learn how to protect your chid from bullies quickly with our FREE TRAINING video. This class is perfect for parents of kids (6 – 12) who want to prevent or stop their child being targeted by bullies.

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Got any comments, questions or tips about how to deal with hating your child’s bully? Share them in the comments below.


Do you worry about your child being picked on? Our Bullyproof Your Child Quickly Guide will show you how to bullyproof your child in just 4 simple steps. The guide includes our letter to the school template. It’s a game changer–get it free for a limited time!



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Bryn Todd

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